Monthly Archives: December 2010

“How do I do straight Leather?”

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Yesterday evening, Master Scott, slave-pup Kalen and I made our way out to Milton to attend a munch put on by a friend of mine.  This munch has been very successful – surprising for a town of what was 36,000 through most of the 80s and 90s, which is now closer to 100,000.  It shouldn’t surprise me but it is also, in many respects, the perfect place for a munch because you get people from Toronto (such as me), Hamilton, Halton Region and even as far as London, ON attending.  Quite the cross roads.

This friend of mine is mostly straight, and probably heteroflexible, if we were to put him into a box of labels.  He’s also grown up in Leather, mostly in the gay community in that Scott and I have been a significant part of his journey.

We got talking about his journey of self discovery, learning to accept himself as a Kinkster and Leatherman, how he is integrating himself within the pansexual community, and creating a space for others.

And you know, hats off to him for creating that space and for giving himself the space to figure himself out.  He now knows what it’s like to come out of the closet.  He might not be gay, but he is going through the same motions that any of us do who come to terms with not being conventional, not fitting a norm; and all the trials, tribulations and reward that come with it.

He said that one of the questions he asked himself at one point was, “How do I do straight Leather?  All of my examples have been from the gay Leather community.”

I smiled at this because we all go through trying to figure out our identities and how we fit into this wide-ranging community.

I know I’ve often wondered, “How do I fit into gay Leather community?”, “What is gay Leather?”, “What if I’m not a masochist?  Does that make me any less of a Leatherman and less value as a submissive?”, “What if I’m not a sadist?  Does that make me any less of a Leatherman?”

As my friend said, the Gay Leather community is the leader and the Pansexual Leather community is like the wild west – and that’s not a bad thing.  It’s like a parallel universe.

And he’s right.  On my fridge I have two magnets from an event in Winnipeg given to me by my favorite sub in Winnipeg, mutt.  One is of two women mostly naked in a fun provocative position; and the other is of mutt in a dog house looking like a very hot dog that he is.

The imagery that appeals to me is the pic of mutt.  The women, *shrugs* I’m so not into feminine things so it appeals less.

At one level, by our very nature, pan is going to be different from gay Leather.  Gay male Leather is about the masculinity of man on man action whether it’s about the sadomasochism, pig sex, gear or service aspects of what we do.

Pan adds a feminine dimension that will never be a part of the gay Leather scene.

I would love to add anecdotes about the Leather Dyke/Women/Lesbian community but I’ve had very limited exposure to that part of our greater community.  What I can say is, holy shit they play rough and hard. *GRIN* I can say that it’s different – similar, yet different in it’s own special way.

BUT, ultimately the tools and how we use them are the same, are they not?

No matter what part of the community you’re in – you have to follow your heart and be true to yourself.

I am one for both combined spaces and separate spaces.  I like the fact that there are men-only play spaces, women-only play spaces, and places where we can get together and have a ball.

And I also know that the pan community is HUNGRY for seeing guy on guy action.  They want to know how guys play, they want to learn from us guys.  In return, I think they have some things to share with us.

After all, the only person to break a paddle on my ass, to date, was a woman.  The standing ovation and clapping from the Fet Photo party was quite something. *GRIN*

The Surprise of Body and Rough Boot Play

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I have to admit, I’m not much of a masochist and probably less of a sadist.  Take for instance, gut punching.  I’ve had it done to me – and I have, in the past, gone down a rather negative headspace; and I’ve done it to other people – and gotten caught up in the headspace of, “OMG I’m going to hurt this person and I don’t know my own strength.”

Even when playing Rugby, despite my nickname of, “Tampax” during my year in the UK, apparently because I could stop any bleeding cunt.  I hated tackling because I thought it would hurt – LOL  For that you can call me a wimp.

Okay, so that is what I thought.

Imagine my surprise when receiving the first blow to the side from a boot from a 6ft3, redhaired redneck from Oklahoma.  Holy fuck, it felt surprising, it felt scary, it felt good and I want more!  And more I got after being an ottoman, being kicked in the side, the love handles stood on, my back pounded, a boot kicking my nuts, and 270lbs standing on me with a pair of Yak Tracks on.

Watching this man kicking someone else’s ass with those shit kickers, stomping, running the tread down someone’s chest and back… it was heavy and it was sensual.  I was lapping up the vibe, drooling from the scene, and was hard.  If I were a leaker, my 501s would have been drenched.

I knew what I was getting into – I knew I could trust the man as others I am close to have trusted themselves with him – word of mouth and the opinions of those I trust in my community is important to me; and after being a demo bottom for him the previous day in a flogging workshop, I had a good sense of his energy – which is AMAZING!

I didn’t know what I was getting into – admittedly, and in some respects it was a good thing because had I known I would probably be putting up all kinds of blocks and admittedly, I would not have spent five hours after flying with such an endorphin rush.

So maybe I’m not a wimp after all, but this sure as hell was edge play for me and I loved every minute of it.  Watching this man work other people over too, was amazing.  This brought body play and even boot play to a whole different level for me.

This is not something I would engage just anyone with.  For me there has to be that connection that I talked about in a previous entry.

I learned something new about myself through this experience, and I appreciate that opportunity.

Boots

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Doc Martens, Nick's Harness Boots

Doc Martens, Nick's Harness Boots

In May of this past year, I bought my first pair of Wescos in San Francisco – Wesco Bosses 12in high, size 11D.  They are the most comfortable boots I have ever worn!

These boots mean a lot to me.  I had asked Sir, a year or so ago, if I could specifically purchase a new pair of boots for play, which was granted.  There was something about that trip to San Francisco – which is a city that is very close to my heart, that seemed right for investing in a pair of the right boots.  And the right boots I found.

As a kid, I loved my parade boots as an air and army cadet.  I loved making those boots shine, and the smell of Kiwi.

As an adult I’ve worn boots consistently since my first trip to Galway, Ireland; where I purchased two pairs of Doc Martens – black and brown. I’ve worn Doc shoes since the early 1990s in high school and it was about time I graduated to a pair of boots.  They are very comfortable, although they’re just not made the same way and the quality has decreased over time.  Regardless, I will always own pairs of Doc Martens – shoes and boots.

Given his work, Sir also wears construction boots which also turn my crank.  And if I see a stocky, Bearish, blue collar looking man wearing construction boots, you can guarantee that I’ll be drooling.  I bought my first pair a few years ago, and while I don’t wear them often, I do smile at the amount of play and hard work those boots have seen.

I bought my first pair of harness boots from Nick’s a few years ago – size 12, featured in the picture above.  I’ve tried to keep these boots polished over time and admittedly they are long overdue for some TLC.

I like boot play.  The first pair of boots I ever set my tongue on was a lovely pair of well worn and loved engineers that Sir owns.  I love licking a pair of boots, being down on my knees or lying, holding on to the boot, licking up the dirt, grime, cum, piss and maybe even polish off a pair.

There’s also the scent of a pair of boots having been worn, and taking them off after a full day of hard work and play. *GRIN*  Socks and feet have been known to cause me to drop into subspace – but that’s a whole different blog entry.

There’s also nothing like being kicked, stomped on and stood on by a pair of hot boots and the command of the person wearing those boots.

Face it, they’re a versatile tool in your Leather toy bag.

On the flip side, I’ve enjoyed topping in my boots too – a boot pig boy is always a good thing in my books.

Face it, boots turn my crank.

I’d to acknowledge those who have inspired me in boots in Toronto, Denver, Detroit and San Francisco – Master C, Daddy David, Master Jack, Black, slave Eric, boy matt (North American Bootblack!!) and boy marc, cub, Alex, the current Bootblack Toronto 2011 slave-boy Jake, and  the many people I’ve not mentioned here – you are appreciated!