I recently joined a Kinky Bears group on Facebook. As Bears, I think those of us into rubber and leather need to build a much closer knit community. I don’t know about your community, but I know here in Toronto the kinky Bears are far and few between, or keep to themselves. It’s really fucking hard to draw them out to events. Then again, in the days of COVID-19, there are no events.

So I have decided to contribute articles each week to the group.

Upon joining I used an old picture of me holding a piece of (bunny) rabbit fur which I have been known to use in scene and is one of the things that Sir did to me. Here’s the article I wrote about why I choose that picture:

I’m considering writing up something once or twice a week to spur kinky ideas in all of us.  *GRIN*

So why rabbit fur?  Well firstly, it’s a pervertable and one of the first prevertables I was introduced to.  Anyone who knows my Sir knows that it’s a very Sir thing.

Not all BDSM and kink has to hurt right?  It can be about sensation and sensory play and that’s where rabbit fur comes into play.

Tie someone up, blindfold them and start doing sensory play on them can bring up some really nice reactions – something I love as a top/dom is pulling out reactions from the bottom/sub.

Believe me – some of the hottest scenes I’ve done have involved lighter touch rather than going in hard.  One is not necessarily better than the other, again, for me, it’s about seeing the reaction from the bottom.

Anyone that knows me knows my nuts are sensitive.  I often say that I used to come with a manual that said, “Don’t touch my nuts” but over time Sir helped to desensitise them enough so that he could do CBT on them.

Now I’m going to use a word that most Bearish guys fear – shaving!  My Sir has me regularly shave my nuts.  Now the interesting thing is, that in and of itself gives a really neat sensation.  With fur and without is quite different.

Shave you nuts, get tied down, and rub rabbit fur, or any fur, on them and for someone like me, it can be quite something.

What can I say about MAL2020? It was a blast? It was amazing? That and more.

I reconnected with the North American Leather and Fetish communities after some time away, in a big way and in a way I had not been able to before. I was ready to jump back in.

A bit of background – I stepped away from the community due to the stupidity of politics that was, essentially, making me sick. I was seeing my own community implode and I really wanted nothing to do with the implosion, and I was exhausted. I will say this: It’s okay to take a break.

Scott and I jumped on a flight from Toronto Pearson to Washington National, got whisked away in a taxi to our hotel and chilled for the night.

The next morning we headed over to the Hyatt for our first day. Scott was dressed in his JediBear shirt and myself in latex and rubber flagging the things I’m into.

Arriving at the hotel there was an unmistakable energy to the place when it comes to such a celebration of fetish, kink and sex. It felt pretty amazing and I had a grin. I admit that prior to arriving at MAL, I wasn’t sure what to expect but I was blown away.

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First stop – the vendor fair to see a pup I’ve been handling in the UK, his Sir to whom he is collared and his Daddy – Congrats to Moodybear for their first time vending at MAL! Having observed what it takes for a vendor to get prepared for such an event, please do support your favourite independent businesses – and the kink community is full of them! It was also very good to briefly connect with Kelvin and Mikey, despite how busy the weekend was.

The vendor fair – holy crap! This was the Fetish Mall of America where you could find ANYTHING, or so it felt! Where else would I find the finger portion to a finger flogger I bought that was missing that part? A gas mask with rebreather bag? Gear, equipment, leather, rubber, neoprene, pup hoods, estim kits, canes, and the list could go on.

Needless to say, we stocked up on things we had always dreamed about getting. For example, a Porta Plow from Fort Troff for both at home and on the road; and I picked up two lighter floggers for practicing two-handed/Florentine flogging.

With the space that Scott and I have at home, I’ve long struggled with how do we create a kinky space when we want it, and a calm regenerative home space. MAL helped make it happen for us and I think it will help in the future. I definitely want to go back! Now how do I collapse a rim chair down to bring back to Canada and the United Kingdom?

We even found Scott gloves and boots which had me extremely chuffed as it is very difficult to find someone with his size of hands, feet and calves gear off the rack!

I was dressed in rubber for Rubber Cocktails which I had seen Seth, dressed in casual leathers, and I suggested he join me. Prior to that I had my boots shined by boy john who was part of the same ECLSb title class as me and Sir. We’ve had a long connection. If he’s around and available to black, I’ll make my boots available to him.

For an event like MAL, the hotel lobby is a key place to cruise and hang out. I never thought that I’d feel comfortable in such a space, but surprisingly it felt right. It was great reconnecting with Ed, Steve, Ron and his boy, and making new connections with people we met.

I went to the DC Eagle that night, by myself to smoke my pipe and check it out. A great large space!

The next day I decided to put on my Chicago K-9 Unit gear with Scott wearing his Dr Woof Weeping Angels shirt, kilt, red socks and new boots. Scott looked amazing.

We ended up meeting up with Daddy Gary, boy Jon, and BurrPup Ursus – again more reconnections and new connections. Scott remarked to me at the end of the weekend that between the pup and I, we have the fetish world completely connected.

If there is one thing I’ve learned recently is how deep the pup community has gotten. It feels much like the boy community building various clubs a few years after I was collared to Master Chuck. As I explore handling, it has been an eye opener for a community that I’ve been arms-length from for possibly too long.

Play-wise I ended up getting into two scenes. One involved flogging, coffee piss and a good pounding; the other was a straight up flogging scene for a pup I met at Smokeout in 2019. Then again, there was also pounding some ass that was offered to me at Smokeout in 2019 as well, that I finally took advantage of. I’ve not played like I have at any other hotel-based run in North America. Refreshing!

That night was Leather Cocktails – I say that anyone has to do this at least once, and to actually see both the parade of colours and the dropping of the cock ring. it’s a great chance to see friends and make new friends in Leather.

That night I was invited out by a Sir and his boy to The Green Lantern to hang out and reconnect. A fitting last night to the weekend.

The next day it was back to the Hyatt for brunch, seeing Gunny and his pup sox, who did an amazing job of servicing my Wesco Big Bosses, one last run through for last minute items at the vendor fair, saying goodbyes and we were off home.

We’ll be back – thanks pup for putting it on our radar!

I’ve been an off and on again user of Twitter. I’ve had many a good Twitter discussion, especially around the 2010-2014 period before I decided to delete my account.

With the demise of Tumblr, I decided to head back to Twitter.

I have to hand it to one of my favourite porn stars and a Daddy I admire, Will Angel who has some important stuff to say in a two part video called, “So, what’s an Alpha anyway?” – Thanks for the title Daddy Will. 😈

Up there with switching, this year I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about what it means to be Alpha, having an alpha personality and in many respects the responsibility that comes with that. As much as I struggled with being told I have quite an alpha personality, the more at ease I’ve become, the less of an ass I’ve become.

On the flip side, there’s the whole what is the persona of an Alpha that people create in their heads – always a top, always dominant and über all of that.

Heaven forbid if such an Alpha bottoms and shows something vulnerable, right?

Talking to my husband and one of his boys, the bottom shaming my husband gets when he’s straight up about also enjoying the bottom side of things. “But I want a total top”.. Seriously fuck off.

The boy who is pretty much all bottom gets fucking attitude and told, “I don’t want to throw my hotdog down a hallway” – Uhm, really? In my books that’s grounds for a blocking after a good bollocking. That boy could break you.

I digress.

If it weren’t for bottoms, those of us who are more top oriented; if it weren’t for those betas and omegas, those of us who are more alpha wouldn’t have people around to pleasure or serve us. If I didn’t spend the time in that beta space, I wouldn’t be the man I am today.

To be clear I’m not limiting this discussion to just ass play which inspired Will’s context. It goes for any kind of play or service. If I had a sub top and I wanted a good CBT scene, a flogging or something else I’m not going to be afraid to bottom to them, and I certainly have done in my past – and enjoyed seeing their eyes light up.

Let’s get our heads out of our asses. Stop the fucking attitude and the bottom shaming.

Daddy Will – it’s fucking hot to see you get fucked because my boy side loves top service just as my dominant side loves to take ass.

For the next few blog entries, I’m going to talk a bit about how 2019 has been quite transformative for me, and it has.

Let’s talk about gear.

Prior to March 2019, my attitude was, yeah I liked gear but it’s such a pain to put it on just to take it off. I’d occasionally put it on but honestly, unless I was going up to Sudbury, or going out in Toronto, what’s the point?

There was a point where I used to go to work booted every day wearing my Wesco Boss boots that I picked up in May 2010. Even that started to go by the wayside.

First with experimenting with rubber, neoprene, going to events and having excuses every weekend to find something fetish related, it’s easily become an important and key part of my life on the weekend.

Fast forward to Christmas and spending two weeks with my mother-in-law. Unfortunately the turn around time meant I forgot some key things at home, such as my leather gloves that, since September, have been a key part of my daily gear – thanks pup for the inspiration there!

For two weeks I was missing my gear. The only gear I had with me was a Kooga rugby shirt and my leather jacket.

I seriously couldn’t wait to get home, and when I did, I got into my rubber and spent some much needed time with my boy.

Like I said, I could not have anticipated that back in January 2019. On this eve of heading to MAL, I am genuinely excited for a weekend in gear.